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Nikhil Chinappa and Pearl on relationships

`Laugh at your own flaws'

I am not going to speak for everyone, but I really like chest hair in men. — Pearl


NIKHIL CHINAPPA and Pearl. They make news wherever they go. Nikhil, for his ability to reel off lines at the drop of a hat, as also for his skill at the turntable. Pearl, for being one among the few women disc jockeys in the country and for having played in many happening clubs around the world.

But the two together make a more sensational copy than Nikhil or Pearl individually, as PRINCE FREDERICK found out. The two, whose relationship has been the staple of Page Three for some time now, spoke, interestingly, on relationships.

Nikhil: Do women talk as much about men as men about women?

Pearl: Lots more than you think. And, most of this gossip takes place in the washroom.

Nikhil: (Cheerfully) A great mystery solved. I've always wondered along with the rest of mankind what women discuss in the washroom. (Nodding his head) Hmm, now I know, they gossip about men. Well, do women talk about men the way men do about them?

Pearl: I really don't know how men talk about women.

Nikhil: Well, men can be very descriptive, you know.

Pearl: When women talk about men, they are more than descriptive; they go into a lot of details.

Nikhil: Not all of them are complimentary, I assume?

Pearl: (laughing) Yeah, you're right there.

Nikhil: What do women look for when they get into a relationship?

Pearl: I have come across all sorts of women. Some are not looking for a long-term thing. They just want to have what a lot of guys want to — just a fling or a little bit of fun. But most women I know look for honesty and respect. They basically want their man's world to revolve around them. We're not asking for too much, are we?

Nikhil: I guess it is the same with men as well.

Pearl: What do you look for in your woman?

Nikhil: (With eyes packed with emotion) Tenderness, loving care, good DJing abilities (both laugh)... and glossy lipstick.

Pearl: Should they wake up with it?

Nikhil: No! No! Too much shine early in the morning is a turn-off.

Pearl: So, what time is right for a woman to wear glossy lipstick?

Nikhil: Anytime after noon. The point is, I think what all men deep down in their hearts look for is not the image of their mother in their woman, but, honestly speaking, glossy lipstick.

Pearl: I am enlightened, Nikhil. (Stressing each word) Today, I am enlightened. I can truly say that. Until today, I thought men were looking for, subconsciously at least, a little bit of their mother in their woman.

Nikhil: What kind of advice would you give couples starting a relationship?

Pearl: Just get to know each other. Before you really start thinking about a commitment, you need to know that you are compatible. Because, like everyone will tell you, after the first rush, it is pretty much the companionship that sees you through.

Nikhil: The ability to laugh at oneself is a big help in a relationship. Instead of pointing out flaws in the other person, you must be able to look at your own and laugh at them. (Holding his nose) Like, you must be able to say, `Hey, my nose is really big.'

Pearl: (Protesting) But I love your nose! Didn't you know that? (Laughs)

Nikhil: I know that's the only thing that keeps us together. If I ever got plastic surgery done, our relationship will end. The nose goes, the relationship goes.

Pearl: Exactly!

Nikhil: Do all women love chest hair in their men?

Pearl: Well, I am not going to speak for everyone, but I think most women do. I really like chest hair in men!

Nikhil: I know when you're angry with your guy, you like to pluck out his chest hair with a pair of pliers. One by one. (Making noises) Twing! Twing!

Pearl: Yes, I love to do that. Hey, how did you know that?

Nikhil: Because I saw an old, rusty pair of pliers in your handbag, the one that you carry around with you all the time. At first I thought it was a good luck charm; then I saw hair on it. And one morning, I was wondering why my chest was hurting so much. I knew that while I was sleeping you had been doing evil deeds with your pliers. The proof is there (pointing to Pearl's handbag).

Pearl: Now we know why Nikhil has very little or no chest hair, because (with an evil look) Pearl's been at it.

Nikhil: I am going to buy a jar of olive oil, some fertiliser and a sprinkler and stand in the sun everyday.

Pearl: I can help you with that, because I have a vested interest.

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