Sharing the gift

Joint Commissioner of Police, Training, Delhi, Kiran Bedi is known for her reforms of conditions at Tihar as Inspector General, Prisons. "Meeting her was a refreshing experience. She was friendly and attentive, even after a long day's work. What inspires her to share her courage, her strength and sense of values?" asks T. K. V. Desikachar.

The one thing that repeatedly fascinates T.K.V. Desikachar is the inherent concern and care for society - a message that is in every teaching, be it Christianity, Buddhism, Judaism, everything. He believes that the time has come to address the conflict and despair in society today with the relevance of this message.

In this column, Desikachar will engage in a dialogue with people who have influence over society and who have a vision deeper than material success.

You are a police officer dealing with issues of justice and law everyday...and you are a human being with moral values, sentiments, emotions...how would you define dharma?

TO be truly just, I have to keep my emotions under control. I have to go only by facts on record, by scientifically proven evidence on record. And that is the due process of the law. So you and I may think that something is right or wrong, but finally justice is to protect the innocent, even if the real accused gets away.

Ancient people who spoke about dharma were in a state of meditation, they were sages who were not ordinary human beings. Often these were individuals who had a sense of clarity, who had experienced a peace within themselves...

They spoke of the laws of nature. Dharma is actually the law of nature and what these sages and saints try to tell the people is that the law of nature is eternal. We should try and understand and respect the laws of nature. Our law teaches basically to punish the guilty. But, when I steal, I punish myself because I know, I try to hide myself from getting caught... there is already suffering. Just as there is already a reward if I do something good. Even if society has not rewarded me, I instantly get rewarded because I feel a sense of joy. I feel a sense of peace within me, of being of help to others. (If I have genuinely done it selflessly.) It goes back to the philosophy of the Bhagavad Gita. So here we are talking of an internal reward or punishment. Again, our laws only externalise what is actually internal.

There is also the important concept of svadharma in the Bhagavad Gita. When I am agitated, I do not care for dharma. What is it that people like you, who are under a lot of pressure, do?

I think the learning of awareness, learning about your own self, makes you observe yourself and be aware of what is happening to you. You become two persons within yourself. You are you, but there is another you within you which is watching you - telling you when you are right and when you are wrong.

What you are saying is very true... But, personally, is there a technique, or is there something you develop yourself?

The Vipasana technique is one, which I practise. It helps me observe myself. Just now as I was coming back home, I was sitting in the car and meditating for one hour and fifteen minutes. Observing myself, my body sensations and my thoughts, what is crossing my mind. But if you are agitated and if you sit down to watch your breath, the very fact that you have settled down to observe your breath, the agitation goes.

A person like you who is very busy still finds the time to do something like this to be aware of what is going on inside. One has to make the time.

I have learnt something from reading J. Krishnamurti. He says when you learn to observe yourself, you train yourself with the eyes closed. But after that training, it transcends into eyes open. Now you are looking at yourself in the mirror, not to see if you are beautiful but to see "am I the real person who I project myself as?" Whatever you do, you are observing your breath with the eyes open! That means you are observing your own self and what is happening to you while you are working. You are listening to yourself and watching yourself. You are actually feeling yourself, of what is going on within you - every minute!

People sometimes worry that if you get into this awareness of yourself, you get disillusioned and move away from your social responsibilities...

I don't think you get disinterested. You get detached. There is a difference between being disinterested and not longing for a belonging. I think disinterested would be because I can't get that, I dislike it. And detachment is, it could belong to me if I wanted, but I don't want it. I don't need it - it is more than my need.

You are a real yogi, the way you speak.

My library is full of these books - food for my soul, which help me on my journey!

What I admire is that you are willing to speak of this exercise, this enquiry and to share this with ordinary people around you. For instance, what you did in Tihar...

It is a matter of opportunities. I got the opportunities and I saw the opportunities and I think I also go about creating opportunities.

Creating the opportunities? Is it a question of seeking beyond...

The choice is always there. For instance, as Inspector General, Prisons, I need not have sat on the premises at Tihar. I could have sat in the air-conditioned luxury of the Secretariat. But I chose to be on the prison premises, that is where my work was. To me the question was, what am I here for and how do I do it? It doesn't matter from where I do it. What I did from where I sat was important and I was rarely sitting in my office. I was all the time in the field. I was where my people were. Where my real work was. I was always walking the prison every day. And while walking in the prison, what was my work if I am not there to identify and solve problems? What am I there for? And what were the problems? Anxiety, sorrow, depression, anger and revenge, crime. It was depravity all around. So what am I as IG standing there for if I am not there to wake them up from that to say "this need not be your life - you can have another form too."

To show them another road...

...and to provide them with an opportunity. They are in prison. They can't exercise their choice. So I am the one that has to suggest - would you listen to this suggestion? Would you seek this programme or mediation? Would you listen to this teacher who is there? I have to both create the motivation and provide the environment. They never had the opportunity that I had, and that is the freedom to choose. Their choices were lost. If the choice were in my hands, what would I do? I could leave them to remain locked. Or I could say, open the door and let the fresh air come in, let sunshine come in, feel the sunshine...

So as you walked, you walked with your eyes open...

When I walked the prison for the first time, I had forgotten my wristwatch that day and I just asked "kya time hua"? The prisoners looked at me and didn't say anything. I said, "batavo na"? They said, "hum ko gadi yaha allowed nahi hai. (we are not allowed watches here)." I was shocked. I felt so sad that I was presiding over a human institution where individuals didn't have the right to wear wristwatches, to know what the time is. Where they couldn't see the sun set or the sun rise. I apologised to them and immediately made a declaration that saw to it that they got back their watches immediately. This was an opportunity to learn, to correct. This is what I mean when I say that I create my opportunities. By being at my workshop, by being at my work- place, by being where I should be. If I don't know what is wrong, what I can set right? Whether it was summer, rain or shine, I used to be walking my beat every day to see what I can do better. Though my prisoners were inside the barracks, I, as the IG, was walking around to see are they ok? Are they well?

How did you get support from the system that has all along been different? You have a different view, a different attitude.

Sir, when the leader walks, there are always followers. Every leader can compel attendance. But I was not compelling attendance for myself. I was compelling attendance for their own duty. That is the difference. While I am doing my job, I can compel attendance on two others to do their job. If they don't do it, then I have the power to punish them, which I can use as sparingly or as much as I want. That depends on you - your own management practices. And I know that I use my punishment almost nil, I use rewards to the maximum.

You convinced them of their own worth...

Exactly. I didn't have to say, "I am walking, so you walk". I did it by example. And they felt compelled to follow. After that it became a habit. And they became leaders themselves. My job was to create leadership and not remain a leader. When I was walking, I was actually grooming and training my officers to walk the prison, talk to the prisoners and educate the prisoners.

Your are again touching upon that quality of detachment... of sharing...

Sir, we even have a programme for police officers. When a prisoner seeks revenge, he goes and hurts one person at a time. When a police officer feels deprived, he hurts society as a whole. They are often so disturbed within themselves - what kind of peace will they spread? So, as a part of their training, everyday from 3pm to 4pm they learn internal security - we have bhajans, spiritual sharing, lectures etc. - I call it our inner door programme! And that is how about 1100 police officers did the Vipasana last year in March.

Your energy is effusive...how do you sustain yourself?

I am a product of a very happy and secure home. I had the finest mother and father, who were very spiritual in every way. They were not scripture readers but were simple honest people in their living. So our lifestyle gave us these value systems. My mother's family also used to have a large community eating before my grandparents would eat. These are my sanskars. But I think I am basically a very grateful person. I am grateful for the day I have had, and for all that has made this day possible. It has just been full of blessings. So much of receiving and I have a duty to give back. How can I just receive and sit back? It would be a terrible sin.

This is what is called yagnya. When you receive something, you give back - to your mother, your father, the Guru, or God, nature ....otherwise you are a thief. It is called devayagnya - to the supreme Power. Pitruyagnya - to parents. Manushayagnya - to society. Bhutayagnya - to nature and brahmayagnya - to the teacher. These are called the five yagnyas that we must do every day.

This is exactly the philosophy that I have learnt, to say thank you or namaste. And the police officers too, are for the first time, being trained to say thank you!

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