Know your English

``YOU'RE LATE again!''

``I know! I know! The Guptas are moving out. They wanted me to help them pack. You know they are disposing some of their old things and .....''

``....disposing of.''

``What?''

``They are disposing of some of their old things. When you use `dispose' in the sense of `to get rid of or give away,' it is usually followed by `of'. You don't `dispose' something, you `dispose of' something.''

``I see. Can I say, my mother disposed of all my old clothes?''

``You certainly can. Here's another example. The murderer had disposed of all the bodies by the time the police arrived.''

``Maybe he'll come after you now!''

``If he does, I'll give him your address.''

``Thanks. With friends like you, who needs enemies? Devi disposed of all his shares three weeks ago.''

``He is very lucky. The market crashed a week ago. I need to dispose of these old newspapers.''

``Some of our politicians want judges to dispose of their cases very quickly.''

``I doubt if that will ever happen.''

``I don't think anyone expects it to happen.''

``That's true. Do you think you'll miss the Guptas?''

``I am not really sure. Mrs. Gupta is a wonderful cook. I'll miss her samosas. But it's no fun talking to them, though. They smell garlic all the time.''

``They smell garlic all the time! You mean the Guptas have garlic in their hand which they keep sniffing while they are talking to you?''

``Of course, not! That would be a silly thing to do.''

``Then how do you know they smell garlic all the time?''

``Because when they open their mouth, I can smell the garlic.''

``Oh, I see what you mean. They don't `smell' garlic, they `smell of' garlic.''

``You mean to say there is a difference between the two?''

``Of course, there is. When someone smells garlic from time to time, they take a piece of garlic to their nose and smell it.''

``It's like smelling the flowers while one is out in the garden!''

``Exactly! But when you `smell of' garlic, it means as soon as you open your mouth, everyone knows that you have eaten garlic.''

``In other words, you stink of garlic.''

``I guess you could say that. John smelled the food before putting it in his mouth.''

``You mean `smelt', don't you?''

``Smelled. Smelt. Both are equally acceptable.''

``I see. When Gautham came home, he smelled of whisky.''

``He had too much to drink, perhaps?''

``That's right. The old man smelled of raw onions.''

``That's a good example. Are you referring to Dr. Sudhakar?''

``Yes, I am. He eats non-stop.''

``Dr. Sudhakar is a foodaholic, isn't he?''

``Foodaholic? What does it mean?''

``What does `workaholic' mean?''

``A workaholic is a person who loves to work. Usha, for example, is a workaholic.''

``Similarly, a `foodaholic' is someone who loves....''

``....someone who loves to eat. Someone who eats all the time.''

``Excellent! Anand, I am told, is a foodaholic.''

``Sudha is a foodaholic. She had three large pizzas for dinner last night.''

``Good grief! Is Mr. Gupta a foodaholic?''

``He isn't! But Mrs. Gupta is. She loves two things in life. Eating and watching cricket on TV.''

``Cricket! Why would anyone want to watch our bunch of losers?''

``Mrs. Gupta believes that we had such a rotten luck in Sharjah.''

``We had such rotten luck, not such `a rotten luck'. Luck is an uncountable noun. We don't use `a' before it.''

``I see. Which is why we say, 'We wished the team good luck' and not `We wished the team a good luck'!''

``Excellent! Saroja has had bad luck all week.''

``The Australians, on the other hand, have had wonderful luck all summer. They have kept winning.''

``How do we change our team's luck?''

``My cousin thinks we should choose eleven different players for every match.''

``You mean to say that we'll win then?''

``No! But this is one way of making sure that every cricket player in the country ends up making some money!''

* * *

``I wear my wife's eyeglasses because she wants me to see things her way.'' - Jason Feinburg

S. UPENDRAN

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